4.5.08. Here's what I'm thinking. Back when I was...naive, I used to think people who had been through all this crazy stuff had baggage and I thought that was bad. Everyone I'd ever gotten involved with who was riddled with 'stuff' would end up hurting me. But now I think of it more like 'experience' and that is actually a really good thing. It's only bad baggage if they don't reflect, learn and grow from it. Because then they will continue to repeat negative patterns but like in my own case - I've become quite an experienced women in this life and I think that's really wonderful. My past has shaped me into the women I've become and I am quite happy with myself.
"Impossible means I'm Possible! Plant all your impossible gardens, and see what blooms" -SARK
For awhile I was looking for someone who hadn't been through all the crap I had because I wanted to save them from the pain but now I know that just isn't possible. You don't become who you are without going through that stuff. So my plan backfired and I ended up hurt...again. Now, I would rather be with someone who has a big bulk of life experience under their belt because hopefully they will be able to teach me a few things.
"Have wild imaginings, transformative dreams and perfect calm"
I feel good because I realized that I can be happy in a relationship, or being single. One is not better than the other and should not be compared. The two are very different. I won't say I prefer one over the other but I do know that I am wonderful either way and that is happiness. I'm glad I got married, I love being married and I look forward to being that way again if it turns out that way. But otherwise I am radiant, and glowing and looking forward to independence and all the other joys about living. juicy. succulent. ripe. rare. female.
Have a go.
"I think it's possible to forget how ALIVE we really are. We can become dry and tired, just existing, instead of really living. We need to remind ourselves of the juice of life, and make that a habit" -SARK
3 comments:
Fantastic, Robin. It elevates me to read those words. You have been through a lot in the past 6 months, but you have grown so much as a result. I look forward to our futures together!
Awesome outlook Robin! Like my mom always tells me, everything happens for a reason. I, myself, am learning that each day. I used to think the same thing- that I needed to find someone "pure" or "unhurt by love". People need to get hurt to love again. People are resilent. Once you have been hurt, you can love again 10 times better the next time. It is essential in growing as a person. Baggage is inevitable and a part of life. It is how you learn from that baggage (not to make the same mistakes twice) that shapes you as a person.
Aaaaaand that is why I love my old roommate. :)
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